Archive for March 2012

Great Leader’s Take Sincere Interest in Others

March 29, 2012 Achieve Success Academy No comments

“Taking interest in others is a sure way of making friends faster and building long lasting successful relationships” ~John R. Salkowski

Law of Attraction:

Do you believe in the Law of Attraction? I certainly do. The Law of Attraction will attract the people and things you want into your life if you put it out there to the universe to see and hear. I’ll tell you a story why I believe the Law of Attraction works for me.

My life changed forever on January 10th 2000. On this very day, I was involved in an on-duty shooting that involved me taking another man’s life. This incident stemmed from a Robbery incident where it eventually would turn fatal.

Following the years ahead, I felt my life spiraling out of control. I was acting in such a way that no one wanted to be around me let alone even know me. I was isolating myself from society because I began to hate people and just about everything out there. I looked through a glass that was half empty. This wasn’t me, however I allowed myself to be like this for years. It affected my life in such a way that if I didn’t do something about soon, I was headed down a tragic path. Unbeknownst to me, I was suffering from PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. This carried on for 3yrs before I committed myself to making a change.

I began to read books on personal development like it was going out of style. I began to research people that were living a life that I could only dream about. So, I began to study people that basically came from nothing and had built huge empires for themselves. I studied self-made men and women. Books like, Think and Grow Rich, Laws of Success, The Secret, Anger Free, Rich Dad Poor Dad, Goals, Missed Fortune, Eight Steps to Seven Figures, A Christians Life Manual, Why a Daughter Needs a Dad, How to Win Friends and Influence People, The Little Book of Big Bible Promises and so many others. These books have changed my life. My attitude toward life, people, success, relationships with friends, family and loved ones began to change. With the help of these books and cutting out all negative things in my life that were affecting my attitude like the local news, newspapers, negative people, Television in general, my life began to prosper.

The Building Blocks of Leadership Success

“How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these”. ~ George Washington Carver

I once read a quote from Gandhi, “You can’t shake hands with a clenched fist”. When I read this it hit me like a ton of bricks had just fallen on me. How true was this, I thought?

I have learned that one of the most important keys to a better life, if not the most important one, to building successful relationships is your ability to show a sincere interest in the lives of others. Not only to that person but also to the things that are most important to that person. By expressing genuine interest in someone’s qualities, background, stories, hobbies, career, family, children or anything else closely connected to that person, you will give them a gift- a sense of importance, wellbeing and value.

Here are a few things that I have learned over the years by studying Leadership, Success and Inspiration:

1) When Meeting Someone New or Running into a Friend~When you meet people for the first time or run into them again, you have an opportunity to make a positive impression on them. The key here is to take 10 seconds and make them feel like they are the most important person on this earth. Look them in the eyes with warmth and authenticity and offer them a friendly greeting. If appropriate, give them a firm handshake and/or hug.

2) Call Them by Name~ In all of your communication, written or verbal, first time or repeated, make it a point to use a person’s name. This is very hard for me at times, because I am one to forget a name but never forget a face. When I read Dale Carnegie’s book, How to Win Friends and Influence People it said if you want to win friends, make it a point to remember their name. If you remember their name, you make an impact on them which indicates that they have made an impact on you, adding a sense of importance.

3) Look That Person Directly in The Eyes and Listen Intensely~Have you ever met someone and while talking to them, there looking around at what’s going on around them. Literally paying you no mind. This is not only ignorant but very rude. It makes a person feel unworthy. By looking them in the eyes, this shows the person that you respect them and respect what they are saying. In order to get respect, you must give respect.

4) Inspire and Encourage Others~By inspiring and encouraging others, you lift their spirits, enhance their self-confidence and add fuel to their motivational fire. Perhaps more than anything you give them hope and inspiration. If simple words of encouragement can do so much to enhance someone’s life, why don’t we all do more of it? How long could it take? 10-20 seconds?

5) Acknowledgement~When you acknowledge people, you recognize their value and importance. How about hugging your child(ren) before they go off to school? Or saying “Good Morning” to your co-workers as you walk through the office? Or saying hi to an acquaintance you see dining at another table in a restaurant. When you go out of your way to acknowledge people you will make a positive impression on them.

When you genuinely show an interest in others, they too will show an interest in you. Make it your priority today to Take Sincere Interest in Others!

I’m John R. Salkowski, Founder of AchieveSuccessAcademy.com, Retired Police Officer, Survivor of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) stemming from a shoot and kill robbery incident, Author, Speaker on Leadership, Success and Overcoming Adversity.

Copyright 2012. Achieve Success Academy. All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

Leader’s Leave People Better Than They Found Them

March 28, 2012 Achieve Success Academy 2 comments

“Be the one who nurtures and builds. Be the one who has an understanding and a forgiving heart one who looks for the best in people. Leave people better than you found them.” ~Marvin J. Ashton

Be the One Who Inspires Others

It’s a great feeling making someone’s day. Have you ever just wanted to make someone feel good? I believe, for the most part, most people want to make other’s feel good. Making a positive impact in someone’s life inspires me beyond belief. I truly believe with all my heart and soul that I was put on this earth to make a difference in the lives of other’s.

You know the feeling you get in your gut when you love doing something so much that you would do it for free. That’s the feeling I get about leaving someone better than I found them.

So what is Inspiration?

Inspiration is about finding things that inspire us (amazing ideas, people, and nature), having that inspiration breathed into you and then taking action on it. Creating, doing, and inspiring others to ACTION.

If you’re looking for inspiration you can find it almost anywhere. The key to being inspired is to keep your eyes open. See everything around you as a possible source of inspiration. We are so busy thinking about other things that we miss out on inspiration.

You need inspiration on a regular basis as it isn’t just a one-time thing. When you practice the above method – allowing yourself to breathe in that inspiration by staying in the present and keeping your eyes open to everything – you get better at it. It becomes a skill you can use at any time, and you’ll use it often.

Here are some tips to keep you inspired:

Read daily – mix it up, from success stories, to blogs, to books and magazines of all kinds.

Go outdoors – being in nature is one of the biggest inspirations. Like seeing a rainbow after a storm, or the fiery colors of a sunset.

Get to know new people – they’ll always expose you to new ideas or interesting things, if you’re open to it.

Find time to meditate – creating time to sit and be silent can be more inspiring that you know.

Work with and spend time with inspiring people – find creative, positive, and energetic people that kick you into Action!

Break your routine – take a new route home. Go to a new coffee shop or restaurant. See things from a different perspective.

Exercise – or at least get out for a brisk walk. It helps get ideas moving around and the blood to circulate.

Inspiration isn’t a onetime thing. It’s just like bathing; you must do it every day!

Take Action!

Channel all that inspiration you get and turn it into something amazing. Take this new found inspiration to move you forward, use it, and do something to inspire others.

A Traffic Stop to Making a Difference

“The world is not interested in what we do for a living. What they are interested in is what we have to offer freely – hope strength, love and the power to make a difference!” ~Sasha Azevedo

Back in the early 2000′s, I was still patrolling the streets of Lower Merion Township. While on patrol, I was monitoring traffic at one of the busiest intersections on my beat. I was observing the flow of traffic checking vehicles for expired inspection stickers. In Pennsylvania, as in many other states, each year you have to get your vehicle inspected by a certified Inspection Station. To pass inspection, the mechanic would check your brakes; exterior lighting etc. to make sure everything was in safe working order. I noticed a black Chevrolet coupe with expired inspection stickers. The stickers expired the end of September and we were in the first week of October. Not a huge violation, but I wanted to stop the vehicle to make the driver aware.

I stopped the vehicle and approached the driver from the driver’s side door. As I approached the driver, I noticed through the driver’s side mirror that the young lady driver was crying. I reached the driver’s window and identified myself. I immediately told the young lady that she didn’t need to be upset that I was only making her aware that her inspection stickers had expired a few days.

The young lady had her driver’s license and registration card already waiting for me. I began to ask her if she was okay. The young lady told me that she was just laid off from work by her employer after almost 10yrs. She told me that she hadn’t missed a day of work in 10yrs and that she loved her job more than anything. She said that they didn’t give her a reason other than they decided to downsize. The feeimagesCAAPO6TG Leaders Leave People Better Than They Found ThemimagesCAAPO6TG1 Leaders Leave People Better Than They Found Themling of sadness along with a sick feeling in my stomach overcame me. I felt so bad for her.

Instead of discussing her minor violation, I began to ask her about her job and what she did for 10yrs. As she explained her job, you could see the joy on her face as she described it. You could just tell she loved her job. Not many people can say that.

I said, “May I ask you a question”. She said, “Of course Officer” in the politest and sweetest voice. I said, “Do you believe things happen for a reason”? She said, “I do”. I said, “You may not understand it at this very moment or even over the next few days but this was meant to be”. She said, “How do you mean Officer”? I said, “This chapter in your life was meant to be”. “The good Lord upstairs has something better in store for you”. “When one door closes, a much better door opens”. You could see her tears coming to an end. Her face began to brighten up and her smile began to shine. The young lady thanked me and told me that “I just made her day”. Before she went on her way, I told her, “To stay positive and to focus on the next door that’s about to open for her”. I felt deep down that something much better was in store for her. She thanked me again and began to drive off. I told her, “To drive safe and remember to stay focused and positive”. I stood there in the road for a few seconds, watching her drive away. I was very sad for her but I truly believe the short talk we had made a difference in her life.

So remember, true leaders leave that special someone or the person you just met, better than you found them.

I’m John R. Salkowski, Founder of AchieveSuccessAcademy.com, Retired Police Officer, Survivor of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) from a shoot and kill robbery incident, Author, Speaker on Leadership, Success and Overcoming Adversity.

Copyright 2012. Achieve Success Academy. All Rights Reserved.

 

 

Military Scrambles After Staff Sgt. Robert Bales’ Shooting

March 26, 2012 Achieve Success Academy One comment

U.S. Government Officials Scramble

Just nine days after Staff Sgt. Robert Bale’s shooting in Afghanistan, a Top-Level Pentagon Health Official orders a widespread, emergency review of the military’s use of a notorious anti-malaria drug called mefloquine.

Mefloquine, also known as Lariam, has severe psychiatric side effects. Side effects of the drug include psychotic behavior, paranoia and hallucinations. The drug has been implicated in numerous suicides and homicides, including deaths in the U.S. military. For years the military has used the weekly pill to help prevent malaria among deployed troops.

The U.S. Army nearly stopped the use of mefloquine entirely in 2009 because of the dangers, now only using it in limited circumstances, including sometimes in Afghanistan. In 2009 the Army said soldiers who have suffered a traumatic brain injury should not be given the drug.

Staff Sgt. Robert Bales, accused of murdering 17 of men, women and children suffered a traumatic brain injury in Iraq in 2010 during his third combat tour. According to statistics, repeated combat tours severely increases the risk of post-traumatic stress disorder.

Staff Sgt. Bales’ wife, Karilyn Bales, broke her silence in an interview Sunday with NBC. “It is unbelievable to me. I have no idea what happened, but he would not — he loves children. He would not do that,” she said.

On March 20, Assistant Secretary of Defense for Health Affairs Jonathan Woodson ordered a new & urgent review to make sure that troops were not getting the drug inappropriately. The task order from Woodson, orders an immediate “review of mefloquine prescribing practices” to be completed by the following Monday, six days after the order was issued.

“Some deployed service members may be prescribed mefloquine for malaria prophylaxis without appropriate documentation in their medical records and without proper screening for contraindications,” the order says. It notes that this review must include troops at “deployed locations.”

The sudden violence and apparent cognitive problems related to the crime Bales is accused of mirrors other gruesome cases.

A former Army psychiatrist who was the top advocate for mental health at the Office of the Army Surgeon General recently voiced concern about Bales’ possible mefloquine exposure. “One obvious question to consider is whether he was on mefloquine (Lariam), an anti-malarial medication.” This drug is still used in Afghanistan.

“This medication has been increasingly associated with neuropsychiatric side effects, including depression, psychosis, and suicidal ideation.”

In 2004 in the United Press International stated that use of the drug by six elite Army Special Forces soldiers who took mefloquine then committed suicide. (Suicide is relatively infrequent among Special Forces soldiers).

“You’re ready to take that plunge into hurting someone or hurting and killing yourself, and it comes on unbelievably quickly,” said one Special Forces soldier diagnosed with permanent brain damage from Lariam. “It’s just a sudden thought; it’s the right thing to do. You’ll get a mental picture, and it’s in full color.”

UPI report showed how mefloquine use was a factor in half of the suicides among troops in Iraq in 2003 -– and how suicides dropped by 50 percent after the Army stopped handing out the drug.

In a case that mirrors the Bales’ case, that year the Army dropped charges against Staff Sgt. Georg-Andreas Pogany. Pogany had been the first soldier since Vietnam charged with cowardice. Like Bales, Pogany faced a possible death sentence. The Army dropped the charges after doctors determined that Pogany suffered from Lariam toxicity, which affected his behavior in Iraq.

In 2002, three elite soldiers, who took mefloquine in Afghanistan, returned to murder their wives and then commit suicide. These soldiers were described by friends, family and neighbors after taking the drug as incoherent, strange and angry.

What Does This Mean For Staff Sgt. Robert Bales

Does this mean, Bales’ charges will be dropped like that of Pogany’s? Does Bales’ suffer from a Lariam toxicity? Something affected his behavior that very day. He was pushed to a limit of no return. Was it the Four tours he served or was it the Lariam?

I certainly hope the truth comes out and this soldier gets the help he needs. Giving him the death penalty will not solve the problem. This is not the first case of homicide or suicide among our soldiers. What you read above is evidence that this is a reoccurring problem and this problem needs to be fixed.

I’m John R. Salkowski, Founder of AchieveSuccessAcademy.com, Retired Police Officer, Survivor of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) stemming from a shoot and kill Robbery incident, Author, Speaker on Leadership, Success and Overcoming Adversity.

 

What Caused Staff Sgt. Robert Bales to Commit Murder?

March 23, 2012 Achieve Success Academy 3 comments

If you watch the news, have read articles I’m sure you’re familiar with Staff Sgt. Robert Bales. Staff Sgt. Bales is being charged with 17 counts of murder, assault and a slew of other charges from what’s being called a massacre of Afghan villagers by U.S. officials.

Staggering Statistics from Studies and the Veterans Affairs

Did you know that 1 in 5 returning Afghan and Iraq war veterans suffer from PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or Major Depression according to VA (Veterans Affairs).

Nearly 20 percent of military service members who have returned from Iraq and Afghanistan — 300,000 in all — report symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder or major depression, yet only slightly more than half have sought treatment, according to a new RAND Corporation Study.

In addition too, researchers found about 19 percent of returning service members report that they experienced a possible traumatic brain injury while deployed, with 7 percent reporting both a probable brain injury and current PTSD or major depression.

Many service members said they do not seek treatment for psychological illnesses because they fear it will harm their careers. Being subject to ridicule. Being considered unfit for duty. But even among those who do seek help for PTSD or major depression, only about half receive treatment that researchers consider “minimally adequate” for their illnesses.

In the first analysis of its kind, researchers estimate that PTSD and depression among returning service members will cost the nation as much as $6.2 billion in the two years following deployment — an amount that includes both direct medical care and costs for lost productivity and suicide. Investing in more high-quality treatment could save close to $2 billion within two years by substantially reducing those indirect costs, according to RAND study.

Here’s another staggering statistic. Suicides among returning soldiers are up 26% according to the VA (Veterans Affairs). There are an estimated 30,000 suicides in this country alone and 20% of those suicides are committed by our veterans according to the VA.

We Have an Epidemic on our Hands

We all know that there is a major health crisis facing those men and women who have served our nation in Iraq and Afghanistan. Unless they receive appropriate and effective care for these mental health conditions, there will be long-term consequences for them and for our nation. Unfortunately, there are many barriers preventing them from getting the high-quality treatment they need.

Researchers concluded that a major national effort is needed to expand and improve the capacity of the mental health system to provide effective care to service members and veterans. The effort must include the military, veteran and civilian health care systems, and should focus on training more providers to use high-quality, evidence-based treatment methods and encouraging service members and veterans to seek needed care.

Since October 2001, about 1.6 million U.S. troops have deployed to the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, with many exposed to prolonged periods of combat-related stress or traumatic events. Early evidence suggests that the psychological toll of the deployments may be disproportionately high compared with physical injuries.

The epidemic that is running wild among our returning troops is PTSD and Major Depression. More of our troops are suffering mental illnesses than physical injuries. This is not the first time you have heard one of our returning soldiers committing homicide, suicide, turning to drug & alcohol abuse, marital problems, unemployment, homelessness, committing crimes etc.

Is Staff Sgt. Robert Bales a Killer or a Victim of War?

Is Staff Sgt. Robert Bales a murderer? Is he really a cold blooded killer? Is he a true menace to society? Or is he a victim of circumstances? Did he wake up one morning and say, “I’m going on a murder spree? Who knows? Please understand something, I’m not condoning what Robert Bales did by no means, however you have to stop and think about something. There is definitely something going on with this soldier. You have just read the staggering statistics above. This is a man that has done numerous tours in Afghanistan & Iraq. To be exact, Staff Sgt. Bales served (1) tour in Afghanistan and (3) tours in Iraq. This is a man that has seen more violence, been in involved in more violence than anyone you can imagine. Yes, there are thousands of others that have been exposed to what Robert Bales has been exposed too as well. However, everyone is different, therefore what they experience and how they handle that experience is different as well.

This is a man that is a victim of our war. A victim in the sense that he suffers a major case of PTSD and/or a traumatic brain injury. He was experiencing stress beyond explanation. This is a man that was pushed to his breaking point. Yes, he turned to committing murder on innocent Afghans. People that didn’t deserve to die. But what if Bales would have taken his own life? Would he be considered a hero or another victim of circumstances? This is a man that should not have done (4) tours of war.

As a retired Police Officer and suffer of PTSD myself for shooting and killing a man in the course of a robbery & defending my own life, I can only imagine what Staff Sgt. Bales and the rest of the troops have experienced. I was second guessed, Monday morning quarterbacked, my past picked apart just as Bales’ past is being picked apart. This is unfair. Bales served his country in war not just once but four times. Enough is enough. There should be limits and guidelines on how many tours our troops serve. Where are our Commanders, our Leaders? There in the background not doing what the front-line is doing. Their not in the trenches like they are. Do they really care about them? One can only wonder what their mindset is. Understandably, the job needs to get done but it shouldn’t be at the expense of our fellow men and women. It not only affects them, it affects hundreds of thousands of others. Their families, friends, co-workers.

Staff Sgt. Robert Bales is not a killer. He is a victim of war.

I’m John R. Salkowski, Founder of AchieveSuccessAcademy.com, Retired Police Officer, Survivor of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), and Author, Speaker on Leadership, Success and Overcoming Adversity.

I can be reached via email at John@JohnSalkowski.com

Copyright 2012. Achieve Success Academy. All Rights Reserved.

 

 

 

 

The Top Skills You Must Possess for Leadership Success

March 21, 2012 Achieve Success Academy One comment

“It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations.” – Winston Churchill

Successful leaders understand that one of most critical keys to success is possessing a positive self-image and outlook on life in general.

Feeding you mind daily with positive materials such as success quotes, leadership development training and self-development books and audio-tapes/cd’s will enable you to stay determined and focused.

Quotes have an amazing way of hitting the right nerve at the right time. They are short and pithy, making it easier for us to make our decisions of our day with more clarity and purpose.

“Affirmation without self-discipline is the beginning of delusion” ~ Jim Rohn

1) Self-Discipline~ In order to succeed in any facet of life you must possess and master the skill of self-discipline. Discipline is doing what you must do whether you feel like it or not.

“One cannot manage too may affairs: like pumpkins in the water, one pops up while you try to hold down the other”~ Chinese Proverb

2) Time-Management~ There is no such thing as multi-tasking. You simply cannot do two things at once and do them effectively. Have you ever tried to chase two rabbits at the same time? It doesn’t work. Create a list. Work on the most important task first and work your way down in order. All else should be delegated.

“Indecision Breeds Mediocrity” ~ John R. Salkowski

3) Decision-Making~ Nothing else like indecision breeds mediocrity. In order to be a successful leader you must be decisive in your decision making. You heard the saying analyses paralyses, right? Don’t over analyze. The key to a successful decision is to make sure your thought is well reasoned and thought out properly.

“Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go” ~ William Feather

4) Accountability~ Accountability plays a very important role in your leadership success. If you want to be respected and admired, you must take full accountability of not only your successes but your failures as well. This is a form of confidence and self-belief which is a major ingredient to your success.

“He can who thinks he can, he can’t who thinks he can’t” ~ Orison Swett Marden

5) A Positive Attitude is Everything~ Being positive in all you do is essential for your success. A positive attitude is entirely self-determined and can be helped by accentuating the positive in everything you do. Don’t see the problem, see the solution.

“You need a system to succeed. Talent is never enough.” ~ William Shakespeare

6) Self-Presentation~ If you truly want to be successful you must learn how to present to others. Not the way YOU want to present but the way THEY want to be presented too. The radio station you must tune into when presenting to others is “WIFM”. WIFM means “What’s In It For Me” meaning what’s in it for your prospect. If you learn how to present to others, you’re success is virtually guaranteed.

Leadership success will be yours to take if you follow and master these top skills.

I’m John R. Salkowski, Founder of AchieveSuccessAcademy.com, Retired Police Officer, Survivor of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), and Author, Speaker on Leadership, Success and Overcoming Adversity.

Copyright 2012. Achieve Success Academy. All Rights Reserved.

 

 

How Leaders Overcome Obstacles

March 19, 2012 Achieve Success Academy No comments

“Wanting something is not enough. You must hunger for it. Your motivation must be absolutely compelling in order to overcome the obstacles that will invariably come your way.” ~Les Brown, World Renowned Motivational Speaker who was born out of wedlock, delivered on a front porch of an abandoned home and put up for adoption with his twin brother.

Facing Challenges

Have you ever experienced a setback, faced adversity or a challenge that you could not overcome or at least thought you couldn’t overcome? We have all experienced that at some point in our lives.

As I look back on my life, in particular my childhood, growing up in a blue collar town of Bridgeport, Pennsylvania located 30 minutes west of Philadelphia nothing ever came easy to me.

I wasn’t the smartest, the best looking, and the most athletic kid out there. I struggled my way through or shall I say fought my way through. I was a timid kid. Always picked on by bullies. Totally opposite of who I am today.

I grew up poor. I lived in a row home with my father, mother and three sisters up until I was 10 yrs. old. My parents received food stamps and we had a welfare medical card for our health insurance. The only real vivid memory I have of my childhood was playing on the sidewalk in front of our house with my younger sister, Kelly. My sister and I were best friends growing up. We didn’t have much but we did have fun with what we had.

At the age of 10, my mother moved us in with our Aunt Jane who lived 3 blocks down the street. My mother had decided to leave my father to get away from the physical abuse and alcoholism. Needless to say, I had to grow up fast.

Growing Up Fast

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, “I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.” . . . You must do the thing you think you cannot do.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt

I lived with my Aunt Jane for 2 years before being kicked out of the house for drinking the last of the orange juice. Literally, I was kicked out of her house at the age of 10 for drinking the last of the orange juice. Her reasoning was because she had important medication that she had to take and could only take with her orange juice. My mother was at work so I had to take matters into my own hands.

I filled a trash bag full of my clothes and walked 2 miles to my friend Harry’s house. Harry lived with his mother, 2 brothers, sister, grandmother and uncle in a 3 bedroom home.

I had to negotiate with his grandmother if I could stay there for a while. I agreed to sleep on a cot in a bedroom with Harry and his two brothers. We negotiated $10 a week in rent and I had to buy my own food. Sounded good to me. What did I know being 12yrs old?

One day, I was playing football in the street out in front of Harry’s house with some friends when this rich man, who I’ll call John, driving a brand new black Lincoln Continental stopped to say hello. I knew him because my mother waited tables at his bar. Nice man. Seemed to be pretty wealthy to me. He told me to stop up and see him. He had something he wanted to talk about. I got on my bike and peddled to his home just minutes up the road.

I arrived at his home to find him and his wife sitting at their kitchen table. I sat down and they began to tell me what they were hearing about the living conditions I was experiencing. He had heard that the house was infested with mice and roaches. He then asks me, “Is this true?” I said yes but it was fine. He explained to me what diseases these rodents and insects carry. What did I know, I was 14.

He asked me if I would consider moving in with his family. I agreed immediately. Nice home, in-ground swimming pool. No brainer right? Home cooked meals instead of macaroni and cheese, canned raviolis, hotdogs, frozen pizza etc. Life was looking good.

My Life Got Easier or So I Thought

“It is not the critic who counts, nor the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; who knows great enthusiasms, great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.” ~Theodore Roosevelt

From the age of 14 to 18 should be the time of your life, right? School, girls, dances. For me, these 4yrs was living as a slave. Which meant missing out on my high school years? Missing out on proms, dances, school trips. Years I would never get back. I found out real fast that in order to have home cooked meals, a clean house, in-ground swimming pool, washed clothes; I had to work my ass off. I wasn’t afraid to work for my keep but it went to extremes beyond anything I could have imagined.

I worked year round for John. Not at his place of business but at his home. I did everything from cutting the grass, pulling weeds, cleaning the pool, taking out the trash, cleaning off the dinner table, running errand after errand, planting trees, building retaining walls, digging up the garden, putting up fences, washing the cars. Not just his car but his entire family and neighbors cars. I was a modern day slave.

I was an unhappy teenager. I hated those years of my life. I look back and get pissed off because I should have been doing what other teenagers were doing. Instead, I was at the mercy of another human being so I could have food and shelter. I thought, never ever again, would I ever have to depend on another human being for anything in my life time.

Even though I hated my teenage years, I truly believe that the adversity and challenges I faced sculpted me into the man I am today. The adversity I faced in my teenage years gave me the hunger and edge to want a better life, to be self-reliant, to accomplish more than the average person, to be my own boss, to be a leader.

I’m John R. Salkowski, Founder of AchieveSuccessAcademy.com, Retired Police Officer, Survivor of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), Author, Speaker on Leadership, Success and Overcoming Adversity.

I can be reached via email at John@JohnSalkowski.com.

 

Copyright 2012. Achieve Success Academy. All Rights Reserved

 

 

 

 

Are you a Leader?

March 13, 2012 Achieve Success Academy One comment

“The price of greatness is responsibility” ~Winston Churchill

Responsibility

Leadership is about embracing responsibility whether you like it or not. It’s not just about accepting responsibility when it suits you. Some of our toughest leadership challenges are right in your own backyard, your home, your communities, your schools, your institutions, and your personal life.

One of my biggest pet peeves in life is a person who suffers from a disease I call Excusitis. They have an excuse for everything. They never take ownership for anything they do or say. They always point the finger at someone else. It’s always someone else’s fault. Are you serious? How are you going to learn from your mistakes? How are you going grow as a person? How are you going to grow as a leader of your own life? Do you know anyone like this? Are you like this?

“It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration, I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or de-escalated, and a person is humanized or de-humanized. If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming.” ~J. W. Goethe

Sizing Yourself Up

Whether you believe this or not, we are all Leaders. You lead yourself, your children, your colleagues, your friends, your relatives. In order to lead others it begins with taking a personal inventory of your own strengths and weaknesses and then assessing the opportunities and threats that are likely to present themselves.

Leading yourself begins the same way; think of it as having one promising follower who deserves your best guidance. Sit down with a piece of paper and list all the things you’re good at, including what you’re not good at.

Do you consider yourself being world-class at anything? You better! I know I do! If you don’t consider yourself world-class then you need to sit down and start a list of all things you have accomplished. You need to give yourself credit where it’s due. You don’t have to be world-class to have real accomplishments but thinking you’re world-class will make those accomplishments feel that much better.

How hard or easy you are on yourself is a reflection of how tough and compassionate you’re likely to be as a leader; both qualities can inspire trust.

Stop pointing the finger at others. Take that finger and point it at your chest. Take responsibility for the things you do or don’t do. Admitting this will be the first step in becoming a better leader as well as a better person. Look yourself in that mirror and know that you take full responsibility of everything that happens in your life. Kiss your kids goodnight knowing that you are leading them to be the best human beings they can possibly be. If you can do this, you are a Leader!

I’m John R. Salkowski, Founder of AchieveSuccessAcademy.com, Retired Police Officer, Survivor of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), and Author, Speaker on Leadership, Success and Overcoming Adversity.

I can be reached via email at John@JohnSalkowski.com

 

 

 

 

A Leader Breaks The Silence Code

March 5, 2012 Achieve Success Academy No comments

Absolute silence leads to sadness. It is the image of death~Jean Jacques Rousseau

It’s a Job, Not a Lifestyle

Leadership is the most human imperative. Without leaders how would our society exist? Leaders bring purpose, motivation, inspiration and direction to society and organizations across the globe. In this reading, I am referring to Police Officers.

I was a Police Officer from 1993-2006. During my tenure, I experienced more in my 13 years than the average person, let alone the average Police Officer would experience in a 30 year career. What do I mean by this? I was involved in more and have seen more tragedy, serious crimes/offenses than your average Police Officer. Please keep in mind, I am not referring to our Heros/Heroines that have fought for our country. I am talking about the Police Officer that patrols your streets and handles the day in, day out work that keeps your society safe. By no means am I minimizing this profession.

Whether you like and/or respect Police Officers, you have to admit that it’s a thankless job. Very seldom will you make someone’s day for the better. Very often you make someone’s day for the worse. Police Officers deal with everything from pulling a dead animal off to the side of the road to potentially having to take someone’s life. The span of responsibility is overwhelming and yes, very stressful.

Police Officers, as I would explain them are a different breed. This profession usually attracts the confident, egotistical, arrogant, cocky, macho, controlling type personality. We have all dealt with one at one point or another in our lives.

What makes someone attracted to this profession? What attracted me was being passionate about making a difference in the everyday lives of people. Serving my community to the best of my ability and making a difference. I once heard this saying, this job is like having a front row seat to the most exciting show on earth. Boy was I right and wrong at the same time.

Breaking The Silence Code

Let us be silent that we may hear the whispers of the gods~Ralph Waldo Emerson

The ultimate responsibility of a Police Officer is using deadly force against another human being. If you know a Police Officer ask them what question they have been ask the most. They will tell you, “Have you ever had to use your gun”. Hearing this makes me cringe. When I was ask that question, I cringed. No Officer ever wants to be in that position.

On January 10th, 2000, I was forced into that position. I had to use deadly force on another human being to prevent my life from being taken. I know, I had to do what I had to do to save my life. I agree 100%. However, being in that position is life altering. A position that no one every wants to be in.

The aftermath, the investigations, being Monday morning quarterbacked, being judged about your charcter, integrity, honesty, your personal life stemming all the way back to your childhood days, the decisions you made in the past, the things you have said in the past. Do you get my point? This went on for more than 5 years.

For years, I have struggled with the psychological shock, the uncertainty of operating within the “culture” and the usual burdens of struggle and conflict. I worked extremely hard to maintain my effectiveness as a compassionate and charasmatic leader but at a high personal cost. I was struggling with PTSD or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.

In the early 2000′s very few knew what PTSD was. Most studies on PTSD rarely dealt with the condition among Officers due in part to a bias that do not admit its existence.

The psychological aspect of a traumatic event, the emotional devastation it leaves among anyone especially our returning troops has been slowly recognized and formalized as PTSD. However, there is little mention among Officers because of how we are trained. We are trained to never flinch or to show weaknesses. The Officer who shows a weakness will be deemed a coward or unworthy or unfit for duty. Therefore, Officers remain silent.

I spoke out! I shared how I was feeling! I shared what I was experiencing! I shared what I was going through! I could no longer hold the silence! It was like a cancer eating me from the inside out! I lived through tortune for years! I knew I was a plane spiraling out of control nose diving to earth! I had to do what was good for me!

Do what is best for you and your family. No one cares about you like you and your family. The organizations look out for their best interest. What’s good for them. Not you! Their thinking is that you can and will be replaced. They don’t care about your mental or physical well-being. You must step up and take control of your life. No one else will! Now is your time!

True Leaders do what is Right! They break the silence!

I’m John R. Salkowski, Founder of AchieveSuccessAcademy.com, Retired Police Officer, Survivor of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), Entrepreneur, Author, Speaker, Leading Authority on Leadership, Overcoming Adversity & Fear.

Copyright 2012 Achieve Success Academy All Rights Reserved

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You Can Do anything you want if You Believe You Can

March 2, 2012 Achieve Success Academy No comments

Everything Passess At Par, Temporarily; Truth Alone Remains Permanently~Napoleon Hill

“You Can Do It If You Believe You Can”

Are you self-confident? Do you believe in yourself and your abilities? You must because no one else will. It all starts from within you. With out self-confidence no one can become an efficient leader or take the self initiative in any great undertaking without the belief in yourself.

The Power of Initiative

There is no security on this earth, there is only opportunity~General Douglas MacArthur

Initiative and Leadership go hand in hand. Leadership is essential for attaining success and Initiative is the foundation upon which Leadership is built. Initiative is as important to success as the wings to an airplane.

Initiative is that rare quality which impels a person to do what ought to be done without being told to do it. This is what Initiative is to me. Do you possess this quality? You must because it’s paramount to your success.

A powerful example of initiative is found in one of the greatess successes of all time. Founders of Microsoft Bill Gates and Paul Allen. Two individuals that were so obsessed with programming the computers we have today that they thought of nothing else.

A great philosopher once said, “Initiative is the passkey that opens the door of opportunity.”

Becoming a Person of Initiative and Leadership

What helped you over the great obstacles of life was asked of a highly successful man? The other obstacles, he replied.

Are you a procrastinator? The habit of putting off until tomorrow what should have been done yesterday, last week, last month, last year will hold you back from true success. You will not accomplish anything until you eliminate this deadly disease of procrastination.

Would you like to know how to overcome procrastination? This, well-known and scientifically tested principle is called Auto-Suggestion. I want you to copy this formula, put it in a conspicious place in a room where you will see it upon retiring for the evening and arising in the morning.

If you do this, this will start forming a habit of you taking action each day that will carry you one step closer to attaining your Definite Chief Passion or DCP.

Here is it: The Lesson for Eliminating Procrastination

I know that procrastination is a deadly disease of all who want to become leaders in any undertaking and I will eliminate this very bad habit from my personal being.

1-Doing that one thing each day, that very something that ought to be done without anyone telling me to do it.

2-Finding that one thing that I can do each and everyday that I have not beeen doing that will bring value to others without exceptation of reward or payback.

3-Sharing this habit with at least someone in your life that you trust of the value of practicing this habit of doing something that ought to be done without being told to do it.

The muscles of the body become strong with repeated use. Understand that the habit of Initiative also becomes strong with repeated use. It takes only 21 days to make or break a habit. You CAN DO THIS!

I’m John R. Salkowski, Founder of AchieveSuccessAcademy.com, Retired Police Officer, Survivor of PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), Author, Speaker on Leadership, Success and Overcoming Adversity.

I can reached via email at John@JohnSalkowski.com

Copyright 2012 Achieve Success Academy All Rights Reserved